While I’m not a huge fan of standup comedy, there is one obvious exception to my “It’s Okay I Guess” rule: Robin Williams. I absolutely adore Robin Williams. I’m aware I’m not unique in this regard, but seriously, he was such a talented and, by all accounts, lovely human being, what’s not to adore?
It’s not much of a surprise, then, that when I watched Williams’ Live On Broadway, I got a quote for the book out of it. In a way, it’s probably more of a surprise that it was only one quote. But even this early on in my quote-collecting hobby, I’d established a quasi-rule that didn’t prohibit, but certainly discouraged, multiple quotes from the same source material in a row. It’s my way of making sure that the quote book both doesn’t become unwieldy, and also only contains really, really good quotes – quotes that hit me between the eyes and make me leap across the room for the book, or scrabble for pen and paper if I’m not at home.
In this case, the winner was:
And then you realize that God gave you a penis and a brain, and only enough blood to run one at a time.
This is one of those multilevel quotes – funny on its own, even funnier in context …
… and funniest of all because it puts me in mind of a personal experience that been stuck in my head for going on 30 years. See, there’s a section in the same bit this quote’s from, where Williams addresses sexual stamina, and how being able to ‘last’ for an hour-and-a-half is sold to men as a good thing, while many women wouldn’t necessarily agree.
It reminds me of a conversation between my ex-husband’s best friend and I. One day he asked me how long women like sex to last. Now, we were very close, and there were no verboten subjects between us, so it’s not like he was crossing a boundary or anything. But it was still kind of … bizarre. Like, women aren’t monolithic, dude. I’m not sure how to answer that.
What I said was, “Depends on the woman. Why?”
He told me that he’d always thought women wanted sex to go on for a long time, but he’d been surprised recently during a casual hook-up when his partner for night had asked him:
What are you doing, drilling for oil?
I’ve rarely laughed so hard. But, since this conversation happened many years before I started my collection, plus it wasn’t something that I heard directly but was instead relayed to me, it didn’t meet a couple of other quote book criteria I’d also established. But if there was a quote I’d ever break the rules for, that’s the one.
And I guess, considering that every time I read this Williams bit that old conversation with my friend is where my mind goes, in a way, it did kinda make it into the book after all.
To see previous posts in my Quotes series, click here.